Chapter Fourty Six: Third of the Way Done!

Alright, so before I begin, I'd like to say that this will be the last chapter for a short while. And I know that you're probably thinking "Ugh, she literally just came back and now she's ditching us AGAIN!!!" well, I'm going on a two week vacation. I'm going to bring my laptop so I'll be able to work on the chapters, but because there's no internet I won't be able to post them.
So if anything, when I get back I might post like three chapters at a time. So that'll be fun, right?
...
...Alright, before anyone gets too mad at me, let's start this chapter!!!

Alessi: Come on white haired child! Walk torwards me now!

Buddy: Mother my dear, your mind's so ruddy! I'm not white haired child; my name is Buddy!

Alessi: *eye roll* Alright then, you creepy little poet, just walk torwards me already!

Buddy: Hey! I'm walking for the first time! But I'm afraid I've finally reached my prime

Alessi: ....What?!

Buddy: Oh, i wouldn't expect you to understand, for I will always have the upper hand

Alessi: That's not true! I am the adult, and you are the child!

Buddy: For now, but you see, a grown up is someday what I will be!

Alessi: Yes, SOMEDAY, but not today! And I refuse to argue with a toddler!

Buddy: I don't see why you can't agrue with me. You always argue with the air with such insanity!

Alessi: It's not the air! Its a voice in my head!

Buddy: You sound like a crying little bed wetter. For you aren't making this any better

Haha!

Alessi: Ugh! That's it! I'm done helping you!

Shane decided to stop by Alicia's house after school one day. This is Alicia's youngest daughter, Elissa

Elissa: Oh, it's so incredibly nice to meet you, Shane! I'd like to say that I've heard a lot about you, but unfortunetly, I'm not sure my mother even knew you existed. It's odd, too, since she is your sister and everything...

Shane: Oh, that's all right! My mother doesn't even know I exist half the time...

Elissa: Oh my, I'm very sorry

Shane:  It's fine. *smiles* You are very nice Elissa.

Elissa: Thanks, you are too

Shane: And you are also very very pretty

Elissa: Oh, well, I suppose...
Shane: I'd say that you were beautiful! Gorgeous, even!
Elissa: *blinks in confusion* I'm sorry Shane, but are you flirting with me?
Shane: *laughs* Maybe a little!
Elissa: But we're related...
Shane: Well, just barely
Elissa: Aren't you my uncle?!

Shane: *Angry* Oh please! Even if i wasn't, you wouldn't go out with me anyways!
Elissa: I never said-
Shane: Well would you?!
Elissa: *stuttering* I-I d-d-don't-t know...
Shane: Fine then! I've been rejected all my life! I don't know why I thought this'd be any different!

Elissa: Please calm down! I didn't mean to hurt you! I was just saying that we can't go out because we are too closely related!
Shane: *scowls* You wouldn't go out with my anyways. Nobody likes me!
Elissa: Well i can't say whether I would or not, but I would like to be your friend
Shane: *softens* Really?

Elissa: *hugs* Sure! You seem to really need a friend!
Shane: Oh yeah, I do!
Elissa: Well then we can be friends... but nothing more
Shane: *laughs* Okay, that works

Alessi: *sobs*

What's the matter?

Alessi: Look! It's Tuxie's cat tree!

Sooo...?

Alessi: With no Tuxie! He's goooone!

You only liked him because he ate all the fish!

Alessi: So?

So that's a horrible reason to miss a pet!

Alessi: But what if the fish come back?!

Get another cat?

Alessi: Or I can go steal him back from Buffy!

Uh, no. Buffy will rip you to shreds and then set you on fire if you touch a hair on that cat

Alessi: I don't care! I just don't want to ever see a never fish again!

Well, I can't promise that, and maybe instead of hanging around feeling sorry for yourself, you could go do something productive, like say take care of Buddy

Alessi: *scowls* But I don't like Buddy! He scares me!

He scares me too, but I still think you should spend some time with him

Alessi: *rolls eyes* If it makes you shut up, I'll go spend five minutes with him

Good girl

Alessi: Okay Buddy, promise me that you will never go fishing by the pond and bring home a fish

 

Alessi: If you do, the Lochness Monster will come and swallow you whole!

Buddy: The Lochness Monster doesn't live here, you loon! I can go fishing any afternoon!

Alessi: No you can not! If I catch you even watching the fishing channel, I'll- Oof!

What?

Alessi: I feel funny...

Alessi: Hey! A baby bump!

Yay! You're offically pregnant for the first time in five months!

Alessi: *sigh* Do I really need to keep on doing this?

Do I really need to be tempted to delete you?!

Alessi: Oh! Uhh... I love giving birth! It's, um, soooo much fun!

Yeah, that's what I thought!

Alessi: Heh...
And actually, this is good! You don't have any sketchy maternity wear this time!
Alessi: Oh don't I? Mwahahahaha!
Uhhh what?


 

Omg! Eeeeew!
Alessi: What, Voice?! Is my body not beautilicious enough for you?
Beati-what?! And that's not it! I just don't wanna see your junk!
Alessi: So you think that my "junk" is unattractive, do you?
Frankly, yes I do
Alessi: Well, I've slept with at least twenty guys who would disagree with that statement!
Okay, I know that you're being forced into this and everything, but the fact that you say that with such PRIDE is a bit alarming
Alessi: I don't have to listen to you! Goodnight!
But it's two in the afternoon...
Alessi: I said goodnight!

Alessi: *snore* My body is gorgeous *snore* Like a mannequin *snore* Beauty icon... *snore*

Buddy: Mother I am so incredibly starving! The pain I feel is so alarming!




 

Uhhh Alessi...
Alessi: Must go on tropical vacation *snore*
Alessi...
Alessi: Get man to pay... *snore* Sleep with him on island
Alessi!
Alessi: *snore* Never see kids again... *snore*
ALESSI!

Alessi: *yawn* Okay, okay, I'm up!
Good!
Alessi: What do you... Hey, where's my beautiful outfit?!
Gone.
Alessi: Gone where?!
Heck if I know! But now you have this lovely night gown!
Alessi: BUT I'M WEARING SHEEP!
Yes, and you are rocking it!
Alessi: Grrrr...
Buddy: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
Alessi: Erm, what's that...?
Oh right, the reason I woke you up is cause your kid is starving to death in there
Alessi: Oh is that all? I might as well just go back to bed!
ALESSI!
Alessi: Ugh! Fine *grumbling* Changing my clothes, making me do stuff...
I can hear you!
Alessi: Like I care!

Alessi: Here kid, drink up

Buddy: Thank you mother my dear! But what took you so long to get over here?

Alessi: Well I... HEY!

Alessi: OMG YOU LITTLE NASTY! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU PEED ON THE FLOOR!
Alessi! Calm down!

Alessi: Calm down? CALM DOWN?! I can't calm down! HE PEED ON THE FLOOR!

Yes, but-

Alessi: He missed the potty, Voice! By like, a foot!

Maybe if you tried potty training him...?

Alessi: But that's so much woooooorrrkkkk! *weeps into hands*

Uhhhh pregnancy hormones?

Alessi: *crying* Probably...

Alright, note to self, don't let Alessi take a huge break from having kids ever again... She will completely lose it

On the other side of the house, Dennis has been busy practicing his inventing skill. And it hasn't been going too good...

Dennis: Owww! Burnt myself again! And what IS this thing anyways?! A metal taco?!

Dennis: I give up! I was born to Alessi, that ought to mean I was destined for failure!

He DOES have a point...



Shane: No Jaycee, I'm not even kidding! She's preggers AGAIN! This has got to be her fiftieth time giving birth or something! *scowls* I just hate it! I can't wait till I become a young adult! This is all too much drama for me!



 Alessi: AAAAAAAHHHHH!

Oh hey! You're in labor! That was fast!

Alessi: Fast?! That was an AAAAAAAAHHHH emotional roller coaster!

Yeah, true...

Alessi: I just need to AAAAAHHHHH get this frikkin thing AAAAAHHHH out of me AAAHHHHH already before I AAAAHHHH burst!

I think you're gonna burst either way!

Alessi: That's not AAAAHHHHH funny, Voice!

Who said I was trying to be funny?



Well, after all of that screaming, Alessi gave birth to baby #33 Parry Bright

He was born with the traits Friendly and Easily Impressed

So I know techicnally speaking 33 kids isn't REALLY a third of the way to a hundred, because that's actually 33.3333, but its close enough :P Though if you want to count baby #34 as a third of the way, then go right ahead, but I think that Parry is special

Anyways, I'm happy to have reached this before going on vacation. I'll see you guys in two weeks!!! :) 

Chapter Forty One: Friendship is Magic!

Hark! It's the great white whale!
Alessi: You JERK! You know I'm preggers!
Yes, yes I do!
Alessi: I don't ordinarily look like this... Do I?!
No, actually, quite the oppo-
Alessi: I can't believe it! I'm FAT!!!! *weeps*
Alessi, I was just kidding!
Alessi: Lies!!

Alessi: For shame! I must hide my belly! Go unborn offspring! Go hide all the way in the back! Make Mommy look skinny!
Why must the weirdest, most disgusting things come out of your mouth?!
Alessi: Whaaat?! I was being serious?
I thought that you outgrew loathing your children! Now you hate them because they make you fat?
Alessi: Okay one, I will never outgrow my hatred for having 100 babies...
*sigh* Fair enough...
Alessi: And two, I don't hate this baby! I actually kind of like it!
Really?
Alessi: Yes! It serves as a momento of my fun in the hot toob...
What does Shane serve as a momento of?

Alessi: Shane? Who's Shane?!
Your son...
Alessi: Stephen? Rodrick? Mickey?
Your BABY son! The one you just had a little while ago!
Alessi:....Oh yes, the blonde one. I remember him now.
You forgot your own child?!
Alessi: When you've popped out as many as I had, names sort of become a blur.
Uh huh...
Alessi: So it isn't MY fault I can't remember Shaun!
SHANE!
Alessi: Same difference!

Poor little Shane is constantly neglected and left in his crib. The only one who truly cares about him is his big sister, Jaycee, and she's at school most of the day.

Jaycee tried to be there for him as much as she could. She pretty much potty trained him and was also the one who taught him how to walk and how to talk. Both were kind of outcasts in their family, since Jaycee was the ignored twin, and her sister's evil, and Shane is just plain forgotten.

Tuxie has also made a new friend.
Buffy: Yay Tuxie! Claw Mom's good desk! Harder! Deeper! Go go go!
Tuxie: Mawr!
Buffy: Yaaay! *giggles* Mom's gonna flip!



I also have a quick announcement:
I sent Jaycee down to the grocery store to pick up some bubble bath before she aged up, and I spotted this young man.

This is Byron Bright, Autumn's son. I never showed him to you guys. I kept forgetting and putting it off for another chapter, and now he is a child. So, I'm sorry about that, but better late than never, right?

I also saw Cathy, Alicia and Parker's little girl. Isn't she just beautiful?

But getting back in to the story, it's party time!

Sabrina: Mwahahaha! I can't wait to finally be rid of all you LOSERS! Once I finally leave this place, the world will be miiine!

Alessi: You should talk to Joy. She has the same dream!

*facepalm*

Jaycee: Ha ha! Well I just wish to find my love monkey!

Alessi: You look like a monkey.

ALESSI!

Alessi: Wellll I'm not in to lying!

Sabrina: I'm not either!



Here is our lovely, yet evil,  little Sabbie. I am really happy how she turned out. She is beautiful! Anyways, she gained the Dislikes Children trait, so altogether she is an evil snob who makes messes all tries to make it look attractive for the guys, but she hates kids.

And this is Jaycee! She is... Okay looking. She isn't beautiful like her sister, but she's pretty on the inside... Right? Hmm... Well, like I told my little sister, let this be a lesson towards you. Big lips don't equal attractive, no matter what the plastic surgeons tell you!
Well, moving on from Jay's over all appearance, let's talk traits. She gained the Athletic trait, so altogether she is a lonley athlete who likes being daring outside, and is super smart.

Alicia's other daughter, Elissa, showed up just then, in time to watch the rest of her uncles and aunt age up.

Jaycee: Yaaaay! *blows horn*
Buffy: Keep that peice of crap away from my ear unless you want it shoved down your throat!
Boo: When do I get a turn?!
Buffy: When I'm done!
Boo: No fair! No fair!

Alessi: Make a wish, Buffy!
Buffy: Don't tell me what to do, old lady!
Alessi: OLD?! *cries*
Buffy: *giggles*
Boo: Is it MY turn yet?!
Buffy: GO AWAY!!!

Buffy: Yay! Happy birthday to me!
Boo: I'm doing it now! I don't care what anyone has to say about it!
Boo, be patient! Let your sister age up!
Boo: But Monster...
Buffy: *twitches* You did NOT just call me that again!
Uh oh....

Well, dispite all of that... Trouble, Buffy did age up very pretty! She rolled the Animal Lover trait... So wait, she's a mean spiritied animal lover? So is she mean to the animals, or just people? Hmmm....

And because Boo was being impatient, he aged up at around the same time as his sister. Isn't he handsome?! I was pleasantly surprised! I was a little disapointed that the curls didn't look good on him anymore, but eh, he looks good with this hair! Anyways, Boo aged up well and rolled the Genius trait... Hmmm, Insane AND Genius? Maybe he'll realize that I'm not a monster...

Alessi: Okay Shep...
SHANE!
Alessi: Erm, right... Come on.... Shane,This is the last party. Let's just get this over with!
Buffy: Mom, you are disgusting! You are more disgusting than a trash can! Not only do you talk to something that isn't there...
Alessi: Voice sooooo exists! Your weird because you DON'T talk to her!
Uhhh.... That's not really how that works...
Buffy: Am not! Your a weirdo and you treat your kids like crap!
Alessi: It's not my fault I'm forced to have 100 babies!
Buffy: *jaw drop* Whaaaaa....?

Alessi: *sigh* Okay, now that Buffy is speechless, let's just finish this up, shall we?
Shane: *giggle* Mommy, is my birthday!
Alessi: Yes, yes come on Sherlock!
Shane!
Alessi: Whatevs! Come on, blow out your candles already!

Well, here's Shane as a child. He's adorable, isn't he? Hold on to that, though, because he is now Hot Headed! Hehehe, this will be interesting....

Hi Boo!
Boo:...Monster, if you don't mind, I am very busy right now!
With?
Boo: I am playing chess against a very worth opponet!
...Thats the computer player
Boo: And he is very good at this game!
He doesn't exist...

Boo: I don't judge, Monster. And besides, you don't techicinally exist either!
Hey!
Boo: So, if you excuse me, I need to get back to trying to win now!
Have fun with that...

Meanwhile, Buffy has been fully embracing her new Animal Lover trait. She and Tuxie have been spending every second together. They play, cuddle, and Buffy grooms him until his coat shines.

Buffy finally found a friend, and she doesn't even find the urge to be mean to him (Unlike everyone else in her life...)

And Tuxie looks like he is in looove!

The next morning, Jaycee and Alessi bonded a little bit, since Jaycee and Sabrina were about to leave.
Alessi: *whispering* I have a confession to make...
Jaycee: What?
Alessi: I was forced to give birth to you by a mysterious voice...
Well when you put it like that, it sounds horrible...
Alessi: It WAS horrible!
Jaycee: Mmmhhhmmmm....
Alessi: Don't eyeball me like that, girl!

Jaycee: I'm not eyeballing you, Mom. Just, ummm, promise me that when I'm gone, you'll be nicer to Shane and the twins... And this new baby too.
Alessi: Awwww do I really have to?
Sabrina: Sup losers! I'm just gonna be making my way out now...
Alessi: No, Sabbie, wait!
Sabrina: *growls*

Sabrina: I don't wanna talk to you! I have places to go and people to rob!
Alessi: Oh Sabbie, my dear, I am going to miss you so much!
Jaycee: Huh? What about me?
Alessi: I already talked to you!
Jaycee: But aren't you gonna miss me?!

Sabrina: Oh, Jaycee! *laughs* No one is going to miss you!
Jaycee:...Not true!
Sabrina: Oh come on, you are ugly! I mean, your lips are huge!
Jaycee: Yes, but....
Sabrina: *deepens voice and pulls on face* Oh look at me, I'm Jaycee! I am unlovable and afraid to admit it!
Jaycee: I do NOT talk like that.... And besides, I don't care what you say! I LIKE how I look!
Sabrina:.. Are you BLIND?!

The two left soon after. Poor Jaycee ended up deciding to stay with her sister. Why, I don't know, but I hope that she realizes that a proper revenge against her would be to tell the world about her peeing herself as a child... Although, she'd probably have to flee the country if she did that.

Sabrina, in a final act of defiance at her mother, leaves a rotting pile of food on the floor, whcih completely stinks up the house.

That evening, Jaycee called her little brother.
Shane: Hi Jaycce! I am sooo glad to hear from you! Where did.... Wait, what do you mean you left?! I thought... Well, I wanna get out of here too!

Shane: Mommy doesn't even know my name! I wanna run away and come live with you!

Alessi: Aah! My stomach! My stomach!

Alessi: Sawyer! Sawyer! Call the cops, Sawyer! I'm squeezing a baby out of me!
Shane: She's yelling at me, Jaycee! And she STILL doesn't know my name!

Well, the cops never showed up, but Alessi still gave birth to baby #31 Dennis Bright.

He was born with the traits Friendly and Eccentric


Isn't he just plain ADORABLE?! I'm thrilled that he inherited the Moore family hair color. My friend Maddy suggested the name, and it seems to fit him. Though, I was hoping for a girl so i could name her Aubree, but still, Dennis is too cute for me to be mad at him ^.^