Sunday, April 6, 2014

Chapter Forty Seven: Of Burglars and Blow Ups


Alright, so even though it's been... Umm... How long has it been....?
 TWO YEARS?! What?! Ugh. Okay, well, I'm SURE I don't have any readers left, but like I was saying, even though it's literally been years since this has been updated, I still want to complete this challenge. And anyways, even though Alessi is a nasty little twit, I can't seem to let her go. And I figure that since Sims 4 is coming out soon, finally finishing this damn challenge would be the perfect finale to this game for me.

Obviously, though, things have changed since the last update. A lot of things.

For example, a bunch of Alessi's kids have simply ceased to exist.

You see, when I tried to install Seasons on my laptop a while back, my entire game was wiped out. I don't know how or why, but everything was just... gone. I ended up having to re-install everything on my mom's computer. Any sims that weren't on the exchange are gone forever.

Shane, Dennis, Buddy, and Parry don't exist anymore, sad but true. This seriously disrupts the challenge, because it's not just having the hundred babies, it's raising them. I believe I aged Shane up just before everything went to hell, so he still counts. However, we aren't a third of the way done anymore. Alessi has technically only had thirty babies.

Oh well. I'll miss those little guys, but the show must go on. Alessi can have a fresh start without any little ones bugging her, complete with a new house with new objects, and she'll just have to make up the loss.





Alessi: Well, well, well. Look's who's decided to show their face.
Alessi, you can't see my face.








Alessi: Shut up, Voice! I'm mad at you!
I figured that.
Alessi: Do you have any idea what I've been though all these years?
No, not really.
Alessi: One minute I was at home with my four little brats, and then all of a sudden, everything is GONE!
Gone?
Alessi: Yeah! I was floating around in a blank void for God knows how long before I finally ended up here!
Oh Alessi! That's terrible!






Alessi: Get out of my ear, Voice! I don't want to be talking to you right now!
You look really upset....
Alessi: Have you ever been in an endless void? There's no one to woohoo with!
I'm sorry.... At least I got you back, though
Alessi: Took you long enough....
Well, it's over now, right? Things can only get better from here!






Alessi: I hate you. So. Much.
I know, I know
Alessi: Do you have any idea how it feels? To go without woohoo for so long?
I like how you haven't even asked about your kids at all.
Alessi: My what?
Your kids. You know, those things you've been popping out of you nonstop?
Alessi: Oh, right. Them. Where are those little snots?
Gone. Well, four of them are, anyways.
Alessi: What?
Shane, Dennis, Buddy and Parry have ceased to exist. Or they might have ended up in the endless void you were in. I'm not sure.
Alessi: Oh.... Will I have to give birth to them again?
Well, no.... But they don't count towards the hundred baby goal. 
Alessi: Uuugghhh! So what, I have to have three extra babies?!
Yep.
Alessi: But that's not FAIR! It's not my fault that my kids have been wiped off the face of the earth!
Oh my God. 






You truly are the worst mother in the world.
Alessi: Oh, zip the lip, Voice! You shouldn't be insulting me after sending me into the void!
You don't care that your children might be trapped in the void! Or worse!
Alessi: I tend to live in the moment.
You are terrible.
Alessi: Well look, I'm not happy. It's sort of scary. But Dennis and Parry and Shawn...
SHANE!
Alessi: Fine, whatever! And then than that demon kid who talked in rhyme. They are gone. And I've lost a lot of kids in the course of this challenge. I don't really feel like I can grieve over this.
You're still horrible.
Alessi: YOU'RE horrible! Making me give birth to extra babies! You owe me a bonus of some sort.
Yeah yeah... If you turn around, there is something for you there....






Alessi: What? I just see a house.
Well yeah, I built you a new house!
Alessi: You used to build me a new house every other week!
But this one is pink!
Alessi: *snort* You'll have to do better than that if you expect me to give you three more kids!







Alessi: PINKY! OH MY GOSH!
Yup! And another car too!
Alessi: PINKY!
Yes! And another car!
Alessi: AND PINKY!
*sigh* Okay, okay, you like Pinky. You ready to keep on with the challenge?
Alessi: Can I drive Pinky?!
To the baby daddys' house, yes
Alessi: Than yes!
Great! Now come one, let's go take a tour of your new house!
Alessi: But I wanna drive Pinky!
You need to get settled first. You can go find a new daddy later
Alessi: Ugh. Fine. Let's just get this over with






Okay! So this is the entrance....
Alessi: What the heck? You made an entire room out of a bookshelf?
Uh, no. If you were to turn your head slightly to the right you'd see that there's a little more in here!
Alessi: All I see is a window!
*facepalm* Your other right, Alessi, your other right!






Alessi: Ooooh! There's a microwave in this room!
Yep! And I assume you like the color of the walls?
Alessi: Well of course I do! But I remember that one time when you said pink is tacky. Are you panda-ing or something? Cause that's kinda rude.
I'm gonna assume you meant pandering, and no, I just thought that the wallpaper looks nice!
Alessi: Oh, don't lie, Voice! You're on the Pink Side now!
The what?
Alessi: The Pink Side! You know, it's that thing where all you think about is pink! And salad.
Um, no, I don't think so.
Alessi: Oh Voice, you know what they say!
What's that?
Alessi: Denial isn't just a river in China!
Alright. Well, that's not how...
Alessi: *gasp* WHAT IS THAT MAGICAL WOODEN DEVICE?!







What? The rocking chair?
Alessi: Yes! This chair of rocks is quite amazing!
Yeah, but don't get too comfortable. That's just for rocking the little ones.
Alessi: Ah, shut up Voice. You're such a buzz kill!
We're in the middle of a tour, anyways! Do you see that door behind you?
Alessi: Of course I do! Unlike you, you eyeless weirdo!
What? I have eyes!
Alessi: Nuh uh! You're just a Voice! You have no eyeballs!
I feel like we've been through this before...
Alessi: Oh, I don't know, I was in that void for a really long time.






So this is a room designed to allow you and your future children to work on your skills!
Alessi: What the heck is that steaming glass orb full of pink stuff?
I have no idea. But it's attached to a chemistry station!
Alessi: Chemistry you say?






Alessi, what the hell are you doing?
Alessi: SCIENCE!
Stop it. I don't need you blowing yourself up.
Alessi: I am not going to blow myself up! You need to have more faith in my genius!
Not going to happen.
Alessi: Rude!
Whatever. Come on, let's finish the tour, get you pregnant, and then we can goof around with all the new stuff!






Okay, so this is your room!
Alessi: Oooh! More pink!






Yup! The walls are kind of empty right now, but I figured you can stick some photos up or something






Alessi: I really like this bed! It's so pink and fancy! And it's also the perfect size for woohoo!
Yeah, I thought you'd like it! Now come on, let's look at the kids rooms!
Alessi: Nobody cares about the kids rooms, Voice!
Well, I do!
Alessi: You're just a voice! No one values your opinion!
Oh just come on!






Here is the nursery! It has a blue color scheme going on
Alessi: There's a tree on the wall! And an owl on the tree on the wall!
It's adorable, isn't it?
Alessi: Owls are creepy. It's gonna end up eating the kids.
It's not a real owl!
Alessi: Well, I just wanted to warn you, since you care so much about the kids not dying and stuff.





This is one of the two rooms for the older kids. I'm taking full advantage of the bunk beds from Generations






And here is part of the backyard! It's still a work in progress, but I think there is still more than enough to keep the kids (and Alessi) entertained. There is also a hot tub that isn't shown here





Hey, what are you doing? The tour is finished, I thought we were going for a ride?
Alessi: Well, it just occurred to me that I haven't eaten in like two years. So I figured I should make a salad so that my stomach isn't growling during the woohoo.






Alessi: This plant is too big. I can't put my plate down!
What are you talking about? There's plenty of room!
Alessi: Are you seeing this plant? It's huge!
Alessi, just move the plant out of the way.
Alessi: It's too heavy!
*facepalm*




Alessi: Alright! Salad's gone! Time to woohoo!
You didn't wash the dishes?
Alessi: No time for cleanliness! Time to woohoo!
But you had time to change your clothes?
Alessi: These shorts make my legs look smexy!
And the shirt?






Alessi: Hey! Stop being so nosy about my life choices!
What? I was just wondering!
Alessi: I wanted to wear pink! Guys love pink!
Um, I don't think so, Alessi
Alessi: Look, who's hooked up with like thirty guys. me or you?
You...
Alessi: So let me do my job, m'kay!
Okay, fine. 
Alessi: Now, let's get going! Every second I'm standing here talking to you is a second I'm not out driving Pinky or having woohoo with some hot guy!







Alessi: WOOOOO! THIS IS AWEEESSOOOOMMMMEEE!
Calm down!
Alessi: No way! I've been trapped in a void for like two years! And Pinky wasn't there! So I couldn't drive through the emptiness!






Alessi: Oh hey, who's the dude?
Don Loatario! He makes good babies.
Alessi: Does he also make good woohoo?
I assume so, yes
Alessi: Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!






Alessi: Hiya!
Don: Oh hello! Who are you?
Alessi: I'm Alessi!
Don: Okay. Why are you at my house?
Alessi: To show you a good time of course!
Don: Oh! Are we going to play Jenga?!
Alessi: More like Twister *giggles*
Don: ...What?






Alessi: Hang on Don... I think we're being watched....
Wild Horse: NEIGH! NEIGH YOU!
Don: I think we should go somewhere more private.
Wild Horse: NEIGH YOU DON! YOU KILLED MY FATHER! NEIGH!
Don: Umm... Why don't we go to your place?
Wild Horse: NEIGH YOOOOOOU!






Meanwhile, at the Bright residence, some random lady decided to break into the house while Alessi was away snatching up guys






She didn't get very far, however, since the alarm went off the second she stepped into the house, and the cops showed up almost immediately






Don: Wow, that car of yours sure is exciting! I think the ride over here completely wore me out!
Alessi: Ugh, what is that awful noise?! It sounds like a bicycle horn being run over by a truck!





You might want to get inside, Alessi. There's a situation
Alessi: I can't hear you, Voice! It's too loud out here!
I said go inside! There is a situation!
Alessi: Too loud! Too loud!
ALESSI! GO INSIDE!
Alessi: Okay, okay, no need to yell! Geeze.





Alessi: What the heck?
Cop: Haha! Take that, you slime bag!
Burglar: Ow! My back!
Alessi: Okay, if you guys are going to do that in here, at least go into the bedroom or something!




Burglar: Police brutality! Police brutality!
Cop: Shut your dirty mouth before I stuff it full of pepper spray!





Don: Hey Alessi, what's going on? Why is there a criminal handcuffed outside your house?
Alessi: Don't worry about it, Babe *hugs* Why don't we head inside and forget about this whole situation?
Burglar: Aw, I wish I had a life filled with romance.... Maybe I rob houses to fill a sort of void....
Alessi: I was in a void once too! But then the Voice in my head brought me back!
Burglar: ....






The woohoo didn't happen right away, though. Don was exhausted, so he opted to take a quick nap in the kids room before the action started.






Hey! What are you doing?
Alessi: SCIENCE!
Stop that! You're going to blow yourself up!
Alessi: I will not! I'm a very smart scientist!
So you know that you're about to mix hydrochloric acid and sodium?
Alessi: Of course I do, Voice! What do I look like, an idiot?





Alessi: AHHHH!
Hahaha!
Alessi: Shut up!
I told you that you were going to blow yourself up!
Alessi: I didn't blow myself up! I'm still in one piece, aren't I?
Yeah, but you're all burnt and stuff. And all your clothes are gone!
Alessi: That's sort of sexy, actually.
No it's not! Go get yourself cleaned up before Don wakes up!





Alessi: This feels terrible. Hot water and burns don't mix.
Hydrochloric acid and sodium don't mix either
Alessi: Well, they do, they just don't mix well
Eh, true enough... So did you wash all the soot off yet?
Alessi: Almost. Is Don up?
Yeah, I think so. 
Alessi: I'M GOING IN!




Alessi: Hey babe! What's up? Wanna poke?
Oh geeze. You really forgot how to create a good pick up line, didn't you?
Alessi: Oh, shut up!
Don: I didn't say anything...
Alessi: Oh, not you, Don! *inches closer* So, how do you feel about becoming a daddy?
Don: EW! Why do you smell like burnt hair?!





Alessi: Oh, that's just due to a chemical reaction.
Don: A chemical reaction?
Alessi: Yeah! Between my attraction for you and your attraction for me. It made my hair and stuff singe.
Don: Wow!
Alessi: You wanna help me wash all this scent off?
Don: Oh yes. Definitely.





Don: Oh yeah!
Alessi: BEST! DAY! EVER!





So how was it?
Alessi: AWESOME! It's been so long, I almost forgot how amazing it feels! Almost...
Well, I hope that you're ready for part two of this adventure!
Alessi: There's a part two?! What is it?!
Pregnancy!
Alessi: Huh? No way! I don't think it worked this time! I should get back in the shower...
Uh, no, I heard the lullaby. You are preggers.
Alessi: That's a lie if I ever heard one! A girl can't get pregnant her first time!
Okay, one, that's not even close to being true. And two, this isn't your first time!
Alessi: It's my first time since the void! I'm starting off fresh!
That isn't how it works!
Alessi: You don't know me! You don't know my body! I know both quite well, and I think that I require more woohoo!
Okay, fine, do whatever you want. You're going to have a baby either way.
Alessi: If I'm going to be cranking out children throughout my entire life, I might as well have fun while doing it! *jumps into shower* Oh DoooOooooOoooon!
*sigh* It's great to be back...

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Chapter Fourty Six: Third of the Way Done!

Alright, so before I begin, I'd like to say that this will be the last chapter for a short while. And I know that you're probably thinking "Ugh, she literally just came back and now she's ditching us AGAIN!!!" well, I'm going on a two week vacation. I'm going to bring my laptop so I'll be able to work on the chapters, but because there's no internet I won't be able to post them.
So if anything, when I get back I might post like three chapters at a time. So that'll be fun, right?
...
...Alright, before anyone gets too mad at me, let's start this chapter!!!




Alessi: Come on white haired child! Walk torwards me now!
Buddy: Mother my dear, your mind's so ruddy! I'm not white haired child; my name is Buddy!
Alessi: *eye roll* Alright then, you creepy little poet, just walk torwards me already!







Buddy: Hey! I'm walking for the first time! But I'm afraid I've finally reached my prime
Alessi: ....What?!
Buddy: Oh, i wouldn't expect you to understand, for I will always have the upper hand
Alessi: That's not true! I am the adult, and you are the child!
Buddy: For now, but you see, a grown up is someday what I will be!
Alessi: Yes, SOMEDAY, but not today! And I refuse to argue with a toddler!
Buddy: I don't see why you can't agrue with me. You always argue with the air with such insanity!
Alessi: It's not the air! Its a voice in my head!
Buddy: You sound like a crying little bed wetter. For you aren't making this any better
Haha!
Alessi: Ugh! That's it! I'm done helping you!



















Shane decided to stop by Alicia's house after school one day. This is Alicia's youngest daughter, Elissa



















Elissa: Oh, it's so incredibly nice to meet you, Shane! I'd like to say that I've heard a lot about you, but unfortunetly, I'm not sure my mother even knew you existed. It's odd, too, since she is your sister and everything...
Shane: Oh, that's all right! My mother doesn't even know I exist half the time...
Elissa: Oh my, I'm very sorry
Shane:  It's fine. *smiles* You are very nice Elissa.
Elissa: Thanks, you are too
Shane: And you are also very very pretty




















Elissa: Oh, well, I suppose...
Shane: I'd say that you were beautiful! Gorgeous, even!
Elissa: *blinks in confusion* I'm sorry Shane, but are you flirting with me?
Shane: *laughs* Maybe a little!
Elissa: But we're related...
Shane: Well, just barely
Elissa: Aren't you my uncle?!





















Shane: *Angry* Oh please! Even if i wasn't, you wouldn't go out with me anyways!
Elissa: I never said-
Shane: Well would you?!
Elissa: *stuttering* I-I d-d-don't-t know...
Shane: Fine then! I've been rejected all my life! I don't know why I thought this'd be any different!





















Elissa: Please calm down! I didn't mean to hurt you! I was just saying that we can't go out because we are too closely related!
Shane: *scowls* You wouldn't go out with my anyways. Nobody likes me!
Elissa: Well i can't say whether I would or not, but I would like to be your friend
Shane: *softens* Really?




















Elissa: *hugs* Sure! You seem to really need a friend!
Shane: Oh yeah, I do!
Elissa: Well then we can be friends... but nothing more
Shane: *laughs* Okay, that works







Alessi: *sobs*
What's the matter?
Alessi: Look! It's Tuxie's cat tree!
Sooo...?
Alessi: With no Tuxie! He's goooone!
You only liked him because he ate all the fish!
Alessi: So?
So that's a horrible reason to miss a pet!
Alessi: But what if the fish come back?!
Get another cat?
Alessi: Or I can go steal him back from Buffy!
Uh, no. Buffy will rip you to shreds and then set you on fire if you touch a hair on that cat
Alessi: I don't care! I just don't want to ever see a never fish again!
Well, I can't promise that, and maybe instead of hanging around feeling sorry for yourself, you could go do something productive, like say take care of Buddy
Alessi: *scowls* But I don't like Buddy! He scares me!
He scares me too, but I still think you should spend some time with him
Alessi: *rolls eyes* If it makes you shut up, I'll go spend five minutes with him
Good girl





Alessi: Okay Buddy, promise me that you will never go fishing by the pond and bring home a fish
















 






Alessi: If you do, the Lochness Monster will come and swallow you whole!
Buddy: The Lochness Monster doesn't live here, you loon! I can go fishing any afternoon!




















Alessi: No you can not! If I catch you even watching the fishing channel, I'll- Oof!
What?
Alessi: I feel funny...





















Alessi: Hey! A baby bump!
Yay! You're offically pregnant for the first time in five months!
Alessi: *sigh* Do I really need to keep on doing this?
Do I really need to be tempted to delete you?!
Alessi: Oh! Uhh... I love giving birth! It's, um, soooo much fun!
Yeah, that's what I thought!
Alessi: Heh...
And actually, this is good! You don't have any sketchy maternity wear this time!
Alessi: Oh don't I? Mwahahahaha!
Uhhh what?


 



















Omg! Eeeeew!
Alessi: What, Voice?! Is my body not beautilicious enough for you?
Beati-what?! And that's not it! I just don't wanna see your junk!
Alessi: So you think that my "junk" is unattractive, do you?
Frankly, yes I do
Alessi: Well, I've slept with at least twenty guys who would disagree with that statement!
Okay, I know that you're being forced into this and everything, but the fact that you say that with such PRIDE is a bit alarming
Alessi: I don't have to listen to you! Goodnight!
But it's two in the afternoon...
Alessi: I said goodnight!



















Alessi: *snore* My body is gorgeous *snore* Like a mannequin *snore* Beauty icon... *snore*





















Buddy: Mother I am so incredibly starving! The pain I feel is so alarming!




 
















Uhhh Alessi...
Alessi: Must go on tropical vacation *snore*
Alessi...
Alessi: Get man to pay... *snore* Sleep with him on island
Alessi!
Alessi: *snore* Never see kids again... *snore*
ALESSI!





















Alessi: *yawn* Okay, okay, I'm up!
Good!
Alessi: What do you... Hey, where's my beautiful outfit?!
Gone.
Alessi: Gone where?!
Heck if I know! But now you have this lovely night gown!
Alessi: BUT I'M WEARING SHEEP!
Yes, and you are rocking it!
Alessi: Grrrr...
Buddy: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
Alessi: Erm, what's that...?
Oh right, the reason I woke you up is cause your kid is starving to death in there
Alessi: Oh is that all? I might as well just go back to bed!
ALESSI!
Alessi: Ugh! Fine *grumbling* Changing my clothes, making me do stuff...
I can hear you!
Alessi: Like I care!





















Alessi: Here kid, drink up
Buddy: Thank you mother my dear! But what took you so long to get over here?
Alessi: Well I... HEY!












Alessi: OMG YOU LITTLE NASTY! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU PEED ON THE FLOOR!
Alessi! Calm down!
Alessi: Calm down? CALM DOWN?! I can't calm down! HE PEED ON THE FLOOR!
Yes, but-
Alessi: He missed the potty, Voice! By like, a foot!
Maybe if you tried potty training him...?
Alessi: But that's so much woooooorrrkkkk! *weeps into hands*
Uhhhh pregnancy hormones?
Alessi: *crying* Probably...
Alright, note to self, don't let Alessi take a huge break from having kids ever again... She will completely lose it










On the other side of the house, Dennis has been busy practicing his inventing skill. And it hasn't been going too good...








Dennis: Owww! Burnt myself again! And what IS this thing anyways?! A metal taco?!








Dennis: I give up! I was born to Alessi, that ought to mean I was destined for failure!
He DOES have a point...











Shane: No Jaycee, I'm not even kidding! She's preggers AGAIN! This has got to be her fiftieth time giving birth or something! *scowls* I just hate it! I can't wait till I become a young adult! This is all too much drama for me!










 Alessi: AAAAAAAHHHHH!
Oh hey! You're in labor! That was fast!
Alessi: Fast?! That was an AAAAAAAAHHHH emotional roller coaster!
Yeah, true...












Alessi: I just need to AAAAAHHHHH get this frikkin thing AAAAAHHHH out of me AAAHHHHH already before I AAAAHHHH burst!
I think you're gonna burst either way!
Alessi: That's not AAAAHHHHH funny, Voice!
Who said I was trying to be funny?











Well, after all of that screaming, Alessi gave birth to baby #33 Parry Bright






















He was born with the traits Friendly and Easily Impressed




So I know techicnally speaking 33 kids isn't REALLY a third of the way to a hundred, because that's actually 33.3333, but its close enough :P Though if you want to count baby #34 as a third of the way, then go right ahead, but I think that Parry is special


Anyways, I'm happy to have reached this before going on vacation. I'll see you guys in two weeks!!! :)